I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
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