I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize