make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize