I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
is that a dick in a sweater?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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