just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize