I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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