Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize