that's an acceptable place to lick
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize