i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize