But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
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