Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize