The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
There r osticjed everywhere
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You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
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I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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