my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize