I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
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Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
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