I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize