I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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