marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
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She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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