there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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