I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
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