I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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