New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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