i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
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It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
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Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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