his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to summon your inner elephant
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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