You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Randomize