WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
We just shotgunned beers for America
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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