I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ATM looks so different sober.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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