it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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