I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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