drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize