I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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