you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Randomize