I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
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Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
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Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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