I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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