Capitaan dildo arrescate!
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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