at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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