I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
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