so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
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