im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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