I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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