I'm lost and stupid without you.
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
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