So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize