all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
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