Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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