Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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