i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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