the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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