sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize