she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
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