I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize