Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
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I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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